How do I know if I'm ready for a new life?

Step Into A New Life is
Perfect for you if...

• You are ready to quit using porn and masturbating
• You are ready to stop sexually acting out
• If you have quit porn or stopped acting out, but you are struggling with edging behavior
• If you have quit porn or stopped acting out, but you are struggling with chronic relapse
• You want to quit using porn and masturbating, but don’t know how 
• You want to stop sexually acting out, but don’t know how 
• Your porn and masturbation use, or sexual acting out is hurting your loved ones
• You are feeling ashamed because of your sexual acting out or porn use and masturbation
• You are neglecting your priorities because of the amount of time you are spending thinking about, obsessing about or watching porn and / or masturbating.

Step Into A New Life is
Not for you if...

• You are using drugs or alcohol in combination with porn and masturbation / sexual acting out, and may need a chemical dependency program
• You have suicidal ideation, and / or significant mental health concerns that may require inpatient treatment 
• If you are not wanting to quit

What You Can Expect from the
New Life Psychology Online Program

Step Into Your New Life

MODULE 1

Understanding and Managing Stress

This module sets up a safe space for learning and experiencing the course materials and understanding the process of coaching. It provides the tools for teaching you to recognize your triggers, understand and manage your triggers, and know when and how to ask for help. It also teaches a framework for managing emotions and how to regulate your emotions when you feel dysregulated.

MODULE 2

Understanding the Addiction

This module teaches you about the neurobiology of addiction, the difference between classical and contemporary sex addiction, and develops a framework for the 10 types of sex addiction. It also allows insight into the familial stereotypes of the 20 subtypes of sex addiction and discusses the arousal template behind each sub type of sex addict.

MODULE 3

Acknowledging Your Addiction

This practical module talks about the step-by-step process of stopping your addiction and going into recovery. What does withdrawal look like? What does getting sober actually look like? This module works on Relapse Prevention at the outset and starts planning from the start what steps need to be put in place to work on building Recovery Capital.

MODULE 4

Recovery Capital

Recovery is a process through which people are able to live, work and participate fully in their communities. It’s a personal journey with the goals of hope, empowerment, and autonomy. Recovery happens following a mental health, substance use, process disorder or compulsive sexual  behaviour challenge and goes hand-in-hand with the overall concept of well-being (a person’s physical, mental, professional, and social health). 

The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) describes four major dimensions of recovery:

1. Health: Overcoming or managing disease and living in a physically and emotionally healthy way.
2. Home: a stable and safe place to live.
3. Purpose: meaningful daily activities, such as a job, school, volunteerism and family
4. Community: relationships and social networks that provide support, friendship, love and hope.

MODULE 5

Self – Awareness in Recovery (Johari Window) / Rigid Defence Systems / Mental Obsession / Stinking Thinking

This module teaches an understanding of the the concept of self-awareness as:

The ability to see yourself as you truly are. 

With that in mind this module supports the discovery of a self-awareness around personal triggers and relapse risks.

Miriam Webster describes self-awareness as “an awareness of one’s own personality or individuality”

The Oxford Dictionary describes it as “Conscious knowledge of one’s own character, feelings, motives and desires.

This module teaches you to be aware of those defenses (like stinking thinking) that you create to protect yourself from shame, remorse, and loss of self-esteem and how they can affect your life in recovery.

MODULE 6

Trauma & Traumatic Stress

It’s normal to experience traumatic stress following a disturbing event, whether it’s a traffic accident, plane crash, violent crime, terrorist attack, global pandemic, or a natural disaster like an earthquake, hurricane, or flood.

We may feel intense shock, confusion, and fear, or feel numb or overwhelmed by a host of conflicting emotions, sometimes all at once.

Research is now showing us that experiences such as neglect in childhood or what we now term Adverse childhood experiences (ACEs); traumatic events that happen between ages 1 and 17 - affect a child’s brain and health as they grow into adults – and these ACEs can lead to mental health or chronic health conditions such as addiction in later life. 

In this module we talk about trauma and traumatic stress and the impact it has on addiction.

MODULE 7

Shame & Guilt

Brene Brown defines shame as an “intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging.”

Shame is an emotion that affects us all, and profoundly shapes the way we interact in the world.

In this module we look at the 3 pillars of shame: secrecy, silence and judgment and discusses empathy as the antidote.

MODULE 8

Self Esteem & Self-Awareness

Self-awareness is the ability to see ourselves clearly and objectively through reflection and introspection.

When we understand ourselves better, it's easier for us to build positive self-esteem. Self-esteem refers to an individual's overall subjective feelings of personal value and self-worth. It can have an effect on many areas of life, including substance use and recovery.

People who have struggled with an addiction are often plagued by self-blame, which worsens low self-esteem. Low self-esteem in recovery can affect our ability to find happiness. Satisfaction in recovery might not be able to be reached and if that’s the case, it will be tempting to return to the numbness of an addiction.

Research also supports the importance of self-forgiveness. Studies suggest that people who forgive themselves for past mistakes experience less anxiety and depression. One of the most crucial aspects of recovery is learning how to forgive. We are flawed humans who will never be perfect.

We must learn to forgive ourselves and others so that peace and serenity are possible. Positive changes can be made, and encouragement is the first step.

This module discusses how self-esteem is just one facet of an ever-evolving life in recovery. It works on developing a higher sense of self-worth which is the foundation on which you build a life beyond your wildest dreams. It all starts with you!

MODULE 9

Anger and Gaslighting

Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation in which the abuser attempts to sow self-doubt and confusion in the victim's mind. Typically, gaslighters are seeking to gain power and control over the other person, by distorting reality and forcing them to question their own judgment and intuition.

Gaslighting is a very common form of abuse used in a betrayal situation.

This module seeks to show the addict how they have gaslit their partner in the relationship in order to start working on righting their wrongs.

MODULE 10

Betrayal Trauma

Complex partner betrayal trauma makes a partner feel like they are losing their mind. It yanks their sense of security out from under them and puts them in a state of emotional free fall.

This module talks about the process of when complex partner betrayal trauma occurs, a partner’s brain begins to operate in a different way. The fear center fires up and stays fired up, creating hypervigilance, restlessness, anxiety, and a sense of being perpetually on guard. This alters their ability to regulate their mood, calm themselves, think, reason, and make intelligent decisions.

Their fear center hijacks their normal functioning, and they find themselves in a world where every task feels challenging, their mind will not stop racing, their emotions feel out of control, and their coping skills are stretched to the limit.

• Attachment Injury – The overwhelming experience of damage to the relational bond through sexual behaviour that violates the trust and safety in the relationship
• Emotional & Psychological Injury – The confusing experience of being lied to, manipulated, coerced, and intimated by the cheating partner in their efforts to protect their secret behaviour.
• Sexual Injury – The impact on the betrayed partner’s sexuality resulting from the cheating partner’s betrayal of sexual agreements within the relationship. 

MODULE 11

Intimacy

During this module, you will learn the true definition of Intimacy and develop an understanding of the 'Nine Components of Intimacy'. Whilst learning about the 'Four Cornerstones to Intimacy' you will also discuss the possible barriers to intimacy.

Throughout this process, you will take a look at your own barriers to intimacy and work on finding ways to bring down your walls and establish greater intimacy in your relationships.

MODULE 12

Healthy Sexuality

This module builds a framework for understanding the Criteria for Healthy Sexuality, as well as discussing the benefits of good sexual health.

In this module we will develop a blueprint for each participants own Healthy Sex Plan including:


• Review 3 Circles Plan
• Sexual Reclamation
• Develop an Understanding of Sexual Wellness


We also discuss the difference between healthy and addictive sex and review healthy sexuality exercises like Sensate Focus.


We finish off the program by developing a plan for the next steps.